Another month has gone by.
We've been able to visit him more often with this weather being a little kinder. I think today will be one of those days! We've been thinking of his headstone, but it is going to have to wait until we can save up some money. You have to pay upfront for headstones and then it takes 2-4 months to get the granite in. So it might not be until the end of summer (hopefully) until it can be put up. Some friends that have also lost their children, told us about an organization that will help pay for children headstones, it's called.. A Good Grief. I think that is such a wonderful idea! Check it out! Anyway, they are willing to help us, but they don't have the funds right now..so we are on a waiting list. So in the mean time,we're saving and maybe we won't need to use their services. Either way it will have to wait. In due time, we'll get one. ;)
You know, one thing that sank in today, we only had 3 months with Jonas and Maggie together. And though I tried to take as many pictures, there still are not enough. Plus the one's we do have, well let's face it..I didn't look so great, Maggie was still in the infant, maybe not so cute phase, and Jonas couldn't ever take his mask off. Don't get me wrong, I can't get enough of the one we have. If only there were some better ones too.
I've been struggling lately with things that have been going on. Some days I just want to say "that's it! I don't want to do this anymore!" In those moments, I wish so badly that Jonas were here with me. I think I would be braver for Maggie if he were right by my side. Then it only gets worse because he's not. Maggie looks so much like him, and I still slip up and call her "baby boy" sometimes.
I am so grateful for the time I did have with them both. It was like a little tease though, of what my family could be like and one day will. He was such a good big brother.
I love looking at these two together!
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| his little hand on Maggie's shoulder. I had to hold him, when the reality of SMA with Maggie finally came after she was born. |
Love you little boy!!! Hope you're having fun in Neverland!!
9 comments:
Cute pictures. Iam so sorry you didn't have more time with your sweet babies together. The pictures you did take I am sure are beautiful. Thanks for sharing! Sending hugs your way today :) We love you
Hang in there Linds, WE LOVE you A LOT! We think of you constantly. Hugs and Kisses!!!!
I love that last picture of them with tigger.
what a good big brother. Let us know if there's anything we can do. love you guys :)
When I realized today was the 18th my thoughts turned to you and your family. I am sorry Jonas had to say good-bye. You do have a beautiful family.
Lots of love
Gayle
I wish I could make it better, easier for you. Hugs
Dear Linds,
Just reading your last couple of blog updates. I find myself on your blog often to see past pictures of Jonas and new ones of Magg's. My heart breaks for you and Whit everytime I see pictures of sweet Jonas. I cannot comprehend the emptiness your heart must feel for him. I wish so badly that you could see him right now and what he is up to. I wish I could take SMA away from Maggie so you didn't have to go through this anymore. I wish we could fast forward time sometimes so we could see what the future holds. Mostly I wish you could just have Jonas there with you.
I love you two and think of you often.
Ashley Richards
Been thinking of you! I think i accidentally deleted your last email without writing back. I know how you feel--Charlotte and Ella were only together 4 months, and I will never have a photo of all my kids together. And Lily was gone SO soon. :(
Anyway, hope you get help from A Good Grief! We were so lucky and blessed to have help from family friends in that area.
My heart aches for you and Whitney. I love you both so much. I love looking at the pictures of your family. I am so grateful for the precious moments that you let me have with my dear, sweet little neice. I adore her. Please know that you are loved and prayed for by our family.
Families are forever!
Suz
My three year old was looking at your blog with me. He asked if Jonas was ok, I told him he had been sick and went to Heaven. Then he looked at me and said...Mommy's he's with Jesus, so matter of fact like and like nothing could be better.
I burst into tears, but loved the sweet innocence that little three year old boys have. Nothing could be better than being with Jesus. Lucky Jonas being Jesus' helper up in Heaven.
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